How the Grinch Stole Christmas Spirit (And It's Meaning, Too)

  It's a great relief for me to be able to take some time away from schoolwork. I know that my brain is thankful to have a month to recuperate from the abuse that it was subjected to, which I'm sure many other college students experience during finals week.
  This being said, the absolute LAST thing on my mind was the holiday season. Honestly, my sense of time has been very badly distorted (thanks, college), so it is always a bit of a shock for me when I look at a calender and see that we are so close to entering 2015.
  On top of this, I am barely ever to remember that it's Christmastime.
  I mean, yes, I know that Christmas is December 25th...but it just doesn't "feel" like Christmas.
  Do you remember being young, and being consumed with the holiday spirit? I do. I remember that right when December 1st came around, I would pull out the ornaments box (even though we never bought a tree until a few days before Christmas) and turn on the little device we had that played Christmas tunes. I remember writing my 'Wish List' over and over, and counting down the days until Christmas. I remember shopping for presents with my mother, and having suspense build up inside of me as more and more gifts appeared under the tree. I especially remember waking up nice and early on Christmas morning, and opening gifts while being recorded on video, and laughing and playing with my siblings.
  ...Oh, how things change as you get older.
  Now, at this time of the year, I feel nothing. There is no anticipation surrounding the season. The Christmas tree (no longer a real one that we haul into the house--but a fake one) in my house stays up year-round, mainly because my parents don't care to disassemble it, nor do they have the time. I don't have any desire to give or receive presents. And Christmas morning? I spend it planning for what's to come, as far as work and school are concerned.
  I noticed this change within myself quite some time ago. It started when there was no longer time to go out and buy presents for people, because we were always busy running the Subways. In addition to that, time and other factors had caused us to drift away from our family-friends, so there wasn't really anyone to buy presents for anymore. Soon, Christmastime simply meant that we needed to stock up on more food and supplies in the stores, since others would be out shopping, and thus stopping by to get food.
  And as I began to get more mature, I didn't feel the need to have a 'Wish List'. Since probably the 9th grade, I have declined my parents gifting gestures. When asked 'What do you want for Christmas?' the seasoned answer became 'Nothing.' And not because I was just a perfect child who was too selfless for her own good; I just sincerely didn't want anything. Even a few weeks ago, when my mother asked me what I wanted for Christmas, my response was, "Don't get me anything; just when I ask for something throughout the year, give me the money so I can get it." (And as selfish as that may sound, I assure you that I really don't ask for much throughout the year to begin with.)
  My lack of holiday spirit probably also has something to do with my recent distaste for the way holidays are presented and celebrated. I feel that our society has lost the true meaning of different holidays in the frenzy of shopping deals and fictional characters. I mean, Christmas isn't about giving and receiving gifts, or waiting for Santa Claus to drop down the chimney; it's the anniversary of the birth of Jesus Christ.
  I feel the same way about Thanksgiving. I didn't go home for this holiday, nor did I attend any great big dinner. I just don't see the need to wait for one specific day to be thankful for anything and everything. (Plus, I think we could all agree that skipping out on all of those calories wouldn't be a bad idea, either.)
  And don't even let me get started on Easter.
  And I guess it could be argued that the holiday season is meant to bring families and different groups of people together. But if you are doing this through the showing of the movie 'Elf' or gift-wrapping, instead of discussing what the religious importance of December 25th really is, I'm sorry, but I think that's wrong.
  So how will I be spending my Christmas morning, you may ask? Probably sleeping in, since Subway will be closed. Sending a few prayers in the direction of the Birthday Boy, and his Creator. Awkwardly mingling with my siblings ('awkwardly' because we all haven't lived in the same house together since I was about nine years old). Submitting resumes to different businesses and hospitals in a desperate attempt to score a summer internship. Mourning over my fallen GPA. Continue working on the book that I was supposed to publish two years ago. And maybe I'll tune in for a few Christmas cartoons, for old times sake.
  Happy Holidays, and stay safe!

The Bigger Context of the Criticism of the First Daughters

  Sorry to break it off like this; the first post just got so long!
  Also, what I'm going to address here doesn't solely talk about the First Daughters' situation.

  I think what my biggest issue with Lauten's comments is that it perpetuates what I am going to call the "war on women".
  The other day, one girl pulled up for me a petition created by the public for Beyonce and Jay-Z to "Comb her hair", referring to their two-year-old daughter, Blue Ivy.
  And I was just like, "...what?"
  I recall reading somewhere else (I regret that I cannot site this to give the person credit; I just read it in passing) that it's exactly these kinds of things that cause black girls see themselves in such negative ways.
  I absolutely agree. And I feel like this situation with the First Daughters is another example of this.
  I mean, these are children we are attacking. And for what?
  I can kind of understand the perspective fans have about Blue Ivy: "All that money they have and they can't even comb her hair?"
  But honestly, at the end of the day, what do we have to do with that? Why do the lives of these superstars concern us that much? Shouldn't we be focusing on more pressing matters, like our own lives, or global climate change...?
  But this "war" extends beyond black girls. There is a whole industry that thrives off of belittling women for what they wear or how they look. Take a look at the show that the late Joan Rivers used to run, called "Fashion Police". It revolved around criticizing the way women look. And yes, they do talk about males as well, but let's just be sincere and accept the fact that women are held under more scrutiny in this area than men are.
  And it's these kinds of things that create these boxes that women start believing they have to fit in. Because everything that is advertised to be beautiful is 5'10, size 2 and seemingly flawless.
  This is the "war on women" that I mentioned above. Of course, we could also talk about how women are still paid less than men. But what I'm referring to here is the war on female self-esteem. The public perpetuates criticism of women based on looks, rather than more important things, like personality, values and skill level.
  And now, in 2014, we are seeing this war being taken to a new level, as the public begins to attack children.
  If you ask me, things need to change. Stop telling women how to dress, how to eat, and how to live. Stop telling people to style their daughter's hair in a particular way. And STOP ATTACKING CHILDREN.
  Thanks for reading, and make sure to comment!

First Daughters Face Thanksgiving Criticism

  Hopefully everyone has had a good week. Here in America, we celebrated Thanksgiving last week. Usually the modern tradition of this holiday is to eat everything in sight, and to sacrifice a turkey in the process. This year, however, I did not take part in any events of the kind. Ironically, though, if you ask me, that's exactly what I'm thankful for; I have enough thigh to last me at least one Thanksgiving without taking one from a poor unsuspecting turkey.

  Instead, I have been devouring a story that sprung up from the White House last week. Ironically, it goes hand-in-hand with the festivities; President Barack Obama, alongside with his two daughters, continued a White House tradition of "pardoning" two turkeys, sparing them from "a terrible and delicious fate", in the words of the President.
  You know, I kind of see it as a gag by the White House for them to be like "See? We're not that different from the rest of America. We can be funny and animal-friendly." And since it has been going on for over two decades now, it's not that big of a deal, and doesn't really call for much response from the public anymore.
  However, this year was a bit different. A woman named Elizabeth Lauten, who happened to be the communications director for Rep. Stephen Lee Fincher, took to Facebook to give her personal opinion on the appearance and conduct of the two First Daughters during this ceremony. If you'd like to read exactly what she posted, you can find it here.
  End of the story? She resigned on Monday.
  I first want to say that I find it laughable at what seemed to me as her attempt to salvage her job. In the same link, you can find her apology statement, which she also posted on Facebook. She is so sure to mention her "many hours of prayer". Despite that having slight political relevance (because I think we can all understand that letting America know you're religious can have some positive impact on public perception), let's be sincere here and ask: what do you really think she was praying for? (I'll tell you what I think: it was to keep her J-O-B!)
  Let's now go on to talk about what she said. She obviously does not take much of a liking towards the President nor his family (which isn't too surprising, since she is the staffer for a Republican congressman). But what she says goes beyond politics; she belittles their parenting. Which is one thing I don't approve of. It is one thing to disagree with one's views, but at the end of the day, both individuals go their separate ways. They don't know about each others personal life, therefore there is ABSOLUTELY NO right for either of them to criticize the way the other lives, talk less raise their families.
  She also talks about "respect". Which is pretty ironic to me, because based on her comments, she has absolutely no respect for the First Family. On top of that, for her to go and post such a thing on a social media networking site tells me that she didn't have much respect for her job, either.
  And the best statement: "Dress like you deserve respect, not a spot at a bar."
  Does she realize how old these girls are? A spot at a bar?! They've barely reached the age where they are accepted at the grown-ups table for Thanksgiving, talk less making their way into a bar.
  When you read her comment, you may think: "Damn. For her to write such statements, they must have been dressed very inappropriately." That's what I thought, at least. I figured the case was either that they were wearing plain blue jeans (and maybe not even nice ones), or just clothing that is considered inappropriate for public consumption.
  But if you go watch the video (here is that link again), or even just skip forward to a part of the video where you could see their outfits, you would find nothing of the sort. Malia is wearing a sweater, a CUTE plaid skirt, and tights; Sasha is wearing a semi-formal dress and a cardigan. They aren't dressed like cats in an alley. I personally really liked Malia's look; it's the type of outfit that is not too dressy, but takes a few steps away from everyday casual-wear.
  I think I can personally identify with the girls' mindset towards the event. I know that in my mother's business, she would have meetings once every few months. And when I was younger (starting around eight years old), I was always so eager and excited for it; I would dress up and everything, even though we were simply meeting at a food restaurant. But then time went on, and as years passed, it got repetitive, and held less meaning for me. Now, marking over ten years of having these routine meetings, I simply show up in whatever I felt like putting on that morning, stay in the background, and entertainment myself with my cellular device.
  And it's the same case for these girls. They are 16 and 13 years old. They have to stand and watch their dad make corny jokes, which they have heard for years now. And on top of that: NO PHONES. Kudos to you two.
   All in all, Lauten had it coming for her the moment she decided to hit that 'Post' button. I think this is a great example of the age-old saying, with a modern twist: Think before you post!

  Don't worry! I'm not done! Check out the continuation of this now, here.

Let's Talk About Feminism

  It seems that recently the feminist movement has made a huge rise. It's a little different from what we have seen in previous female-empowerment movements, though--you don't see too many strikes or walks. But where it is happening is on the social stage. People have taken to the media to vocalize their feelings and opinions about the feminist movement.
  Of course, I do stand for equal rights for both genders. However, my attention and energy is usually focused towards environmental issues, so it's not often that I do research into feminist movements. However, I recently stumbled upon a couple of Facebook posts and strings of comments about feminism.
  And honestly, after reading them, I started to fear that this feminist movement is turning into an entirely different monster than what it is meant to be.
  For example, I was reading some people's opinions on cat-calling. And, yes, I do agree that it's not polite and that no one should do it, male or female.
  However, the more I read, the more I started observing people expanding the definition of "cat-calling" to encompass entirely different things.
  One commenter said that women have the right to be in public without being bothered.
  And honestly, I feel that that is a grossly incorrect statement. 'Freedom' doesn't directly translate to 'right to be in public without being bothered'.
  Don't get me wrong. Of course I believe that women should be able to walk the streets without being whistled at. (And that's mainly because I don't think any human should be whistled at; we have a very useful form of communication that has been working for centuries called talking, and I find that to be a much more superior form of communication than whistling.)
  However, no one has the luxury of being in public without being bothered. While walking through a store, you will very likely be bombarded with food sample and offers to buy different products. While sitting in class, someone will probably get your attention to ask you for a sheet of paper or a writing utensil. Hell, even while in the privacy of your own home, you'll receive unwanted telemarketer calls and have different salesmen knocking at your door.
  Do you see where I'm coming from? NO ONE has the luxury of not being bothered. Honestly, that is not what feminism is about, and I think it's false for people to try to add that to the movement.
  Another commenter stated that women have the right to not be made uncomfortable in public.
  So I guess the main bone I have to pick with this one was her word choice. 'Uncomfortable' is a fairly subjective term, and although it could incorporate being harassed in some way, sense, form, or fashion, it also could include feeling uncomfortable because the person sitting next to her has a dog, and the dog happens to have an erection. Unfortunately, no one is able to escape that kind of discomfort, not even the owner. Feminism isn't about "comfort"; it's about safety and equality.
  One male appeared in the comment section and inquired whether it was an issue to just plain and simply tell a random girl in public that she is pretty. The response to his comment was the one about "freedom to not be bothered" that I spoke about earlier.
  This may be where the greatest misunderstanding about cat-calling exists.
  I want you to right now, picture a female being cat-called on the streets. You may think of the age-old situation where construction workers are sitting on their lunch break, calling out inappropriate comments to passing women.
  Now picture this: a female sitting in a coffee shop, reading a book, and a male tapping her and saying "Excuse me, sorry to bother you, but I just wanted to let you know that you are the most beautiful thing that I've laid eyes on all day."
  See the difference? One is mainly done to boost one's ego, and impress his/her buddies; the other is done to make an individual feel good by paying them a compliment, and in turn, make themselves feel good as well.
  And these compliments may not always get paid in the way like described above. One day, when I was pumping gas into my car, I heard someone calling out "Excuse me! Excuse me!" from across the parking lot. When I looked over my shoulder, it was a male walking by, and he simply yelled out "YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL!"
  Hey, maybe not the most ideal way that I'd expect to receive a compliment, but it still makes the cut, doesn't it? I would never consider such a thing to be inappropriate, talk less cat-calling.
  And yeah, yeah, I get it. You just want to be able to pump gas in peace. But everyone, male or female, appreciates being complimented once in a while.
  So don't get caught up in this weird spin that people are putting on feminism. Remember what it's all about: equality amongst men and women. Equal pay. Safety for women. Steer clear of over-reaching implications of it like the ones presented above.
Thanks for reading.

The Environment Talk

  Earlier in my Environmental Politics course, we often talked about what stage should this "Environmental Talk" be occuring at; whether it was a conversation that should be held by large-scale governments, or whether it is something that should be addressed in local communities.
  I always found it funny that whenever posed with these questions, I would be the only student advocating for the 'All of the Above' answer choice. To me, it's the obvious answer choice. But many (not only my classmates) seem to unintentionally pick one method, not realizing that by doing that, they are only tackling a portion of the problem.
  So yes, I am a fence-rider. But what I'm telling you today is that straddling that fence is the way to go.
  Whenever this topic comes up, I always bring up two other topics to support my reasoning: safe sex and tobacco use.
  Those who really know me will roll their eyes at my initial introduction of the comparison to safe sex (because 2 times out of 5, I somehow manage to bring sex into any conversation; and although 2/5 doesn't sound like a big number, TRUST ME, it's way more often than typical person will do it). But once I explain where I'm coming from, they go, "Huh. That makes more sense than it should."
  There was once a time where sex was not something to be spoken of ever, talk less safe sex. But once STIs started making their rounds, and HIV became a familiar and understood concept, it became clear that something needed to be done. And because the probability of stopping people from having sex was almost nil, the next best route was taken: education about safe sex.
  Now, in the 21st century, safe sex culture is something that is synchronized with society here in the US. Sex Education is something taught regularly in schools across the nation, and is a conversation that takes place for many at home. The question now-a-days isn't "Do you use condoms?", but "Why aren't you using a condom?" And screenings for HIV and other STIs are readily available to individuals without much stigma attached to them anymore.
  So how did such a massive culture change manage to happen over a mere number of decades? Multilevel action, that's how. Not only did governments of all levels come together to create a method of attack, but communities also took it upon themselves to educate their members. It even managed to trickle down to the household level, where parents were encouraged to have this conversation with their teens. It took a combined approach from all of these areas to make safe sex into something that is a ubiquitous part of our society.
  This similar approach has been taken in the recent millennium towards tobacco usage. It is hard to believe that there was a time that doctors were recommending cigarettes to their patients. However, as time went on and science came to show how harmful nicotine and tobacco are for our health, a movement started towards the denouncement of tobacco use. Government began putting strict regulations on tobacco companies. Smoking turned into a prohibited practice in and around many buildings and facilities. Laws have been passed making it more difficult for individuals to obtain tobacco products, specifically minors. Today, some states have even imposed massive taxes on tobacco products, which is basically their way of saying 'So we all know that tobacco is bad for you, but since we can't make it illegal, we are going to tax the hell out of it, so when you choose to buy it anyways, you are not only shaving time off of your own life span, but you're also paying up for the adverse effects that you're carelessly exposing others to. Bitch.'
  It's interesting to think that it has penetrated down to the individual level so much, that you could readily hear, "I walked into his apartment and it reeked of cigarette smoke. Total turn-off." (Imagine! People are inadvertently cock-blocking themselves!)
  It can again be seen in this phenomenon how multi-level collaboration towards a common goal is the best approach to combating any massive issue...like environmental issues.
  So what am I calling for here today? I want us to embark on having "The Talk"--The Environmental Talk--on a global level. We need country leader to be meeting consistently talking about reducing carbon outputs. We need scientist to be more aggressive about expanding the data to all people and saying 'Global climate change is real, and it is happening!"We need governments to be buckling down on industries about their effects on Earth's ecosystems. We need the car industry to develop more hybrid cars, and make them appeal to consumers. We need schools talking about this, educating the coming generations about the state of the environment (because let's face it; those people up in Congress aren't going to be alive to be dealing with the real "heat" of global climate change--WE ARE). We need communities fostering recycling. We need the big dogs in D.C. letting us little people know what we can do to reduce our carbon footprints, and providing mechanisms and opportunities for us to do so.
  WE NEED EVERYBODY, on the same page, on the same side, and ready to fight the same fight.
  Thanks for reading.

YOU Are in Control.

  This is just a short post that I wanted to share regarding our emotions, and how we handle them.
  My main reason for doing a post like this is because I feel like I have come a long way in my life as far as my emotional control and stability is considered, and I would love nothing more than to help others make the same transformation that I have.
  I want to start by saying is that life is extremely unpredictable. Everyone faces challenges that are unexpected, and even unimaginable to others who are not in the situation. I want you all to know is that these situations do not define who you are. What does define your character and you as a person is how you deal with the situations.
  Don't get me wrong. We are all human, and we all experience a vast range of emotions: rage, depression, happiness, sorrow, regret, etc... There is NOTHING wrong with going through these emotions. I moreso want to focus a bit on how we deal with these emotions and/or how we let them manifest themselves in different ways.
  Today, I am going to focus on one emotion that I know all too well: anger. I used to be a very angry girl, with a hot temper and a knack for letting it flare up and demonstrating it in a physical manner. It took me a very long time until I was able look back and realize the path of destruction that I had made, and even at that point I was basically at the brink of almost seriously hurting some other people and landing in some potential serious legal issues.
  For those of you all out there who can relate to my prior situation, I want you to know that YOU CAN CHANGE. It isn't the easiest thing in the world, and it definitely doesn't happen overnight. However, if you can take the first step in identifying that you have a problem, and come to an inner conclusion that you want to change, that is a HUGE jump.
  This journey, just like any other, is different for everyone. For me, it was more of an unconscious transformation that happened as a result of other changes that I made in my life. The biggest thing is being able to identify what those things are that push you over the edge, how they push you, and why. Once you are able to determine those things, it is basically a matter of putting the thought and effort into changing them. Sometimes, you may be able to isolate and eliminate those factors from your life altogether, which is always the best. However, we often times are not able to control when those factors will come. But just because you don't control the input, doesn't mean you cannot control the output. Make a conscious effort to remain calm when those thing present themselves in front of you. This can be done in many different ways, and different things work for different people. One thing I always tell myself when such a factor presents itself to me is "Don't let anyone take away my happiness." In other words, let YOU and ONLY YOU be in the driver's seat when it comes to your emotions. Don't let anything anyone else says to you have a negative effect on you, because at the end of the day, you will be the one hurting because of it, not them.
  The last and most important thing I want to touch on is holding grudges. DON'T DO IT. All it does is eats away at your life and your happiness. As much as you may think that you are hurting that person by holding that grudge, I guarantee you that you will end up worse than that person in the long run. I'm not asking you to mindlessly forgive people for all the cruel acts that they do to you. What I am asking you to do is to not hold on to these horrible grudges and feelings of anger or rage or revenge. Again, different people will do this differently. One way I do this is to turn my anger into pity, and just pray that one day that person will face a circumstance that will make them see all their wrongdoings and change their ways. Or I use my anger as a fuel to educate other to not do things that will hurt others, like I am in this post, and this entire blog.
  Another big reason I wanted to talk about this is because I know that a lot of my posts seem to be preaching different things, like I am some all-knowing force of nature. Trust me, I am no saint. I have simply come a long way on my journey to extraordinary (and still have a LONG way to go), and want to share with the world the things that I have learned/still am learning, and hope to educate and help others in the process.
  Remember, YOU ARE IN CONTROL. It's your life, and your happiness, and don't let anyone take it away from you.

Being Black in America

  As much as I want to comment on the Ferguson shooting, I feel as if this is still a fresh wound for the family of Michael Brown and those who are involved. So for the sake of respect, I am going to hold my opinion and release a post specifically about it at a later time.
  What I do want to talk about is a little bit about what it is to be black in America.
  So the first thing I want to say is that I identify as Nigerian, not African American. However, this is the kind of response I often times receive when I try to tell people this:
  -Person: So since you're Black, do you...(insert any African-American stereotype here)?
  -Me: Well, actually, I've never done that before, because I'm actually Nigerian.
  -Person: ...that's what I said.
  The point I want to present here is that in America, ethnicity doesn't matter (and I want to make a brief note that ethnicity and race are two distinctly different groupings). As far as Americans are concerned, all of us are to be identified solely by the color of our skin, or the way we look. You are either White, Black, or Asian. There's nothing else to it.
  So although I do not like this system, I am aware of it and do acknowledge that that is just how the society is.
  I also am aware of and acknowledge the racism and prejudice that people who are categorized as 'Black' receive. I know that we are all placed into one category, and most of the time people apply negative stereotypes to people who look like me. So even though I might be from Nigeria, and the girl in front of me might be from Trinidad (which both of these nations have distinctly different traditions and cultures from that of African Americans), when we both walk into the same building, all someone is going to see is our skin color, and automatically see us in the same light that they see the women who cause commotion on Jerry Springer.
  All of this being considered, I know that I am already held at a disadvantage, solely because of my skin color. This being said, I know that I have to go above and beyond to not only keep myself as far away as possible from the center of their radar and from the stereotypes that they have drilled in their minds about females that look like me, but also to shove them that what they make think about people who look like me is not applicable to all of us.
  That is the sincere way of saying it. Here is me being a little more blunt:
  "Racism is real in America, and as awful as it is, I have to be careful because even though they don't know me, I am already considered loud, rude, unruly and barbaric, and other Americans, especially those of the 'White' race, will not stop at any means if they see me to pose a greater threat to them than I already do because of my skin color."
  Here's my thing: this information that I have just stated isn't exclusive. I'm not at such a high level of thinking that what I've just said is something that I came to after deep contemplation. THIS IS SOMETHING THAT WE ALL KNOW, AND IF WE DON'T WE SHOULD. Let's not be so politically-correct that we won't acknowledge the state of race relations that exist in our society.
  My point is that being a black male or female in America means that YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL. Yes, it is an unfortunate thing that we have to tiptoe around like this, despite being citizens of the United States of America, but it is simply also the truth.
  My advice: If you're a black male or female, don't get caught by the police with drugs. Don't be seen doing any suspicious things, don't be an instigator for any problems, and for heaven sakes, DON'T DRAW ANY NEGATIVE ATTENTION TO YOURSELF. Of course, we are all human, we all do bad things, and we all slip up sometimes. But my point of saying this is because if you get in trouble, whether with another civilian or with the law enforcement, YOU WILL BE DISCRIMINATED AGAINST, BECAUSE OF YOUR SKIN COLOR.
  It's not your fault. You just need to understand race relations, acknowledge where people of our skin color stand on the totem pole, and do everything in your control to not give anyone any more of a reason to suspect/accuse you of anything, or do any harm to you.
  Thanks for reading. Look forward to more posts by this title; I feel as if this is a good, relevant topic, and one that needs to be discussed across all races and generations.
 

How Do I Invest In My Future?

  I know it has been some time since I last posted anything. Don't worry, I haven't forgotten about you guys! It's just that this entire summer has been very busy for me, and now that it is nearing the time for me to start school, I am busy trying to prepare for this new experience.
  I am indeed working on some REALLY good stuff for you guys, but I figured that I should post something in the meantime.
  So I wanted to let you all see a short essay that I wrote some time back for a scholarship.
  I am a strong believer in self-reflection. One form of this comes in going back and looking at things that you have done in the pasts that you produced physically, like essays or artworks or class projects. This, like all other forms of self-reflection, gives you an idea of how much you have changed over periods of time.
  So I wanted to provide you with a piece of work from my past. It had the title "How Do I Invest In My Future?".
  Hope you enjoy!

***

“Cash, or credit?”

            Now-a-days, this seems to be the only way people feel as if they can invest in their future, or even in themselves. The modern society promotes dollar signs as the only way that one can be successful in this world, and that the extent of one’s success is dependent on the number of trailing zeros before the decimal on their bank statement. Because of this, people too often fall for the scam, and end up short-changing themselves, with their future as their present and their present having a balance of $0.00.

            But I…I feel differently. I feel as if money is not the golden currency to use to make the best investment in my future. Instead, I choose to take the route that allows me to slowly invest in my future, one deposit at a time, in the commodity of knowledge.

            Growing up, I never really had a significant household income, and my mother made no effort to hide our financial struggles from my siblings and me. Thus, from a young age, I never considered money to be a feasible option as far as something to put towards my future was concerned. It was around this same time when I became fascinated with healthcare systems, and declared my goal to become a doctor. I would spent my free time watching shows based on doctors and Googling every medical term that came across the lips of each character. I often times was even subject to punishment when my mother would catch me watching the more inappropriate scenes in such shows. But as I got older and my awareness for what it takes to earn the title as a medical practitioner increased, I realized that I wasn’t going to be able to make it to medical school by memorizing the name of different procedures and diseases; I had to put my energy towards excelling in my academics.

            From then on, I was completely informed on what it was I had to do. I became known by my peers as the “bookworm”—always reading or studying or asking questions—doing whatever I could to gain more knowledge. Even my elementary school teachers would be shocked when I would pull out encyclopedias when it came to “free time”. As I continued to grow and age, I ensured that I would study and do all I could to maintain the grades that I expected a doctor to have: all A’s. Even until today, I push myself to produce the best work possible, so that I not only in return get high marks, but also so that I get the most out of my education.

            Of course, though, knowledge is not only gained in the classroom. I learned this through engaging myself in extracurricular activities, such as soccer, basketball, Quiz Bowl, Speech & Debate, and Science Olympiad. I also got a job working at Subway, and would volunteer in the local community through my school and other organizations. These activities were able to provide me with experiences and skills that would have been impossible to learn by just sitting in the classroom, and provided me with more knowledge that I felt have helped me on my journey to become a doctor.

            Now, of course, my journey is nowhere near done. The path I am taking is still very long, and teeming with obstacles, challenges, and even a few failures. But I feel that on this path, I will be able to collect the maximum amount of knowledge, which, in my world, makes me the richest of them all.

Response to Article: Time Magazine

  Per usual, the way some human beings think never ceases to amuse me.
  I just recently read an opinion article online from Time Magazine with the following title: 'White Gays: Stop Stealing Black Female Culture.'
  In short, the author (Sierra Mannie) points out that she doesn't appreciate when white homosexual males "claim either blackness or womanhood". She backs up her views with the following:
      a) White people "snatched up" "extracurricular black activities" (...what?) without having to endure "the ugliness of the black experience", which she refers to as racism.
      b) Black people in America have a disadvantage compared to whites.
      c) Moreso, black women are at a disadvantage compared to whites.
      d) Although gays are stereotyped and maltreated, they can "hide" their homosexuality, as opposed to black women, who "cannot hide their blackness and womanhood to protect themselves the way you can hide your homosexuality."
  Of course, their is more to the article (here is the link, if you're interested), but I wanted to keep the synopsis short, so I can have space for our favorite part: my response.
  So on the surface, I guess one could understand, and maybe agree with her argument. The main parts that I do agree with are the obvious things: that African Americans are held at a disadvantage, especially the females, when put next to a Caucasian-American.
  There was another statement that she made that I only half-way agreed with. It said "Breathing fire behind ugly stereotypes that reduce black females to loud caricatures for you to emulate isn't [okay], either." The reason I can only partially agree with this is because it is arguable that Caucasian-American homosexuals are not the reason that this stereotype exists, nor are they the reason that the stereotype persists in our society. Them (or anyone) re-enacting such behaviors isn't the problem. That is a whole 'nother issue, that lies in the fact that such behaviors are what are promoted and displayed to the society (through movies and shows on television, like 'Love and Hip-Hop'
 and the numerous Tyler Perry productions).
  Now I want to go on to explain what my biggest problem with this woman's viewpoint is.
  I'm not sure if I'm the only one who thinks this way, but I am a big believer in not forming my opinions based on skin color. To me, the culture that she claims is under attack is not "black" culture, but actually American culture. Think about it: the culture that she is referring to isn't the one that was brought over from Africa (and I can personally confirm this to some extent, being that I am a first-generation West African). It's the one that was birthed and brought up here in the States. And, considering the melting pot of a nation we live in, does any group based here really have a right to claim that their culture is anything but American? (The only group I do feel can claim that they are an exception to this are Native Americans, since they had their culture set in a way before America even became 'America'.)
  Also, I do slightly have an issue that she targeted gay Caucasian-Americans in such a manner. Are we really going to pretend as if they are the only ones who poke fun with hip-hop, twerking, and stereotypical African American female behavior?
  So white culture, black culture; straight female culture or homosexual male culture; it really doesn't matter. Can't we all just display nationalism and embrace American culture without addressing our evident (or not-so-evident) differences?
  Thanks for reading.

The Summer Giveth, And The Summer Taketh Away...

  My deepest apologies for being MIA for so long. The end of the school year was extremely hectic, especially considering that I was graduating from high school. But I've finally managed to closed that chapter of my life, and right now I'm kind of just hanging out in Life's Purgatory, waiting to begin the next stage of my life, which features me starting college (whoopie!).
  I am beyond happy to be done with school (the unfortunate truth is, I HATE school; the even more unfortunate truth is that I have 8+ more years of it to look forward to, considering I do go on to go to medical school). My favorite part about the summer (besides the heat) is the time that I have. During the school year, I barely get the opportunity to do things that I want to do because I have so much work to do. But in the summer months, I get a significant amount of time to myself. That especially applies to this summer, because I don't have to worry about test scores or getting in to college, and I'm not doing any summer internships like I was last year.
  However, there is still something in my life that demands ridiculous amounts of attention and manages to suck a significant amount of my free time.
  That's right. I'm talking about SUBWAY.
  I won't get too much into it, but I don't think one understands how much goes into running a business until they've experienced it first-hand. Especially a business like Subway, which is a customer service industry that relies on manual labor. To sum it up, my mother often times refers to the franchises as "her babies", which accurately captures how much work and attention they require.
  (Also, you know that something has consumed your life when you dream about it on a consistent basis.)
  Despite these circumstances, I still do have a lot more free time than I would if I were still in school. So I've been able to use this time to do things that either I have recently taken an interest in, or have been longing to do for some time now.
  These things include:
      -Yoga/Pilates: I got interested in Yoga and Pilates sometime in 2012. I find myself preferring Pilates over Yoga, since Pilates works on strengthening and toning along with flexibility and elongating. The reason that I have been engaging in yoga more though is because I really want to be able to do the different poses and flows that yogis do that incorporate handstands. So far, I'm working on gaining more range of
      -Writing a book: This has been a dream of mine since around the third grade. I had a previous goal to publish a book of some sort before graduating high school. Rather than looking at that as a failed endeavor, I try to see it as a goal that needs a little altering. So I have changed the goal to publish a book before turning the age of 19 (but I'm really working hard to finish a novel before I start college).
      -Picking college courses/major: I used to think that because I was so passionate about the environment, Environmental Science would be the major to pursue in college. So currently, I am already enrolled in their Environmental Science and Sustainability major at my school. However, as I started going through the classes required of me for that particular major, I found that ESS was NOT what I thought it would be. So I am currently in the process of trying to change my major, while at the same time pick classes for my first semester. On top of that, I am trying to pick courses geared towards minors I'm interested in AND the cover pre-med required courses. Talk about difficult! It definitely takes a lot of time to do this, but I kind of enjoy it, since it all is going to benefit me in the long run.
      -Arts & Crafts: Towards the end of the school year, I found myself trying to find ways to decorate my college dorm room. I stumbled upon numerous very crafty and cool ideas. I have never been a very artistic person in the past, but this summer, I have big plans to change that. I've already bought different paints and paintbrushes and wooden planks and canvases, so that I can recreate the nifty ideas that I found online. I like the idea of making these things myself, because I will not only end up with a great finished product, but also something that I can say 'Yeah, I made that' when asked about it.
      -Baking: This has been something that I have been dabbling in and out of for the past two years. This summer, I want to experiment more with different recipes, and perfect some so that I will be able to easily make them while at school for different occasions! (That is, if my mother permits--she says it puts too much temptation to eat the savory sweets right in front of her face!)


  The point I'm trying to make is this: use your summer to its fullest extent! These months introduce new obligations for a lot of us, but at the same time they also make more free time available. So use this time to do those thing you've always wanted to try, but never had time to get around to. Maybe for you that includes swing dancing or visiting Las Vegas, and for other that could be visiting a few new museums or spending more quality time with your significant other. Whatever the feat may be, make it your Summer Resolution to take it on!
  Stay cool, and have a Happy Fourth!

Ethics and Other Related Matters: Part 1

  I am currently enrolled in a course called Environmental Ethics and Leadership. It's a pretty chill class; we meet three times a week, and basically talk about ethics-related things, and environmental-related topics.
  My instructor mentioned a topic that I found to be interesting. He was talking about a man named Rushworth Kidder, who apparently came up with this concept of "ethical fitness". He explained it like this: Kidder came to the conclusion that the more you think about the ethical correctness of different situations, the better you will become at making the morally-correct decisions.
  And when he said that, I though 'Well...not necessarily'.
  I mean, the principle that Kidder offered seems to make sense, right?
  But let me explain to you why I think that this theory is slightly (if not greatly) skewed.
  I find myself to be an extremely moral-based person. My concept of morality, though, isn't necessarily based on the sense of "right" and "wrong"; it's more-so based on the idea of openness. I really focus on the concept that "right" and "wrong" differs across different populations, and thus make an extreme effort to make myself extremely open-minded and extremely politically-correct.
  Now, I'm not saying that I am the perfect being or anything. I'm simply pointing out that I think a lot more about what I say to make sure that it aligns with what I previously stated to be my sense of morality.
  Now, you may be thinking, 'Ohkay. So that lines up pretty accurately with Kidder's theory'. Well, yeah, but I feel like I am a pretty extreme example of the typical person. Many people don't think like me.
  My argument against Kidder's theory is based on the concept that no matter how much one thinks about ethics, there are inevitably lapses in these thoughts.
  I'll use myself as an example. One thing I have taken much time to think about (and even wrote a few college essays about) is the word 'weird'. It is so often used in our society, but what does it really mean? It is often used with a negative connotation, but yet, every instance that I have seen it used in has allowed it to be defined as "different". Why would you make someone feel bad for being different?
  It is a word that I really dislike, and have attempted to eliminate from my vocabulary entirely. But, very rarely, the word does slip. And I use it in the negative connotation that everyone else uses it in.
  This is what I am referring to as a "lapse". Despite my hours and days of thought, I fell back into what I worked so hard to escape.
  Now, don't get me wrong; Kidder's philosophy does make some sense. But I feel as if it is not that simple and straight-forward.
  So why do these lapses happen? I have come to the conclusion that one of the reasons it happens is due to external factors, one big one being society. It is simply human nature to function in groups, and sometimes, we let the influences of these groups get to us, and change our ways of behaving, although we may not necessarily think that way.
  Also, I also like to point out that thinking more about ethically-challenging questions won't necessarily make you "better" at making ethical decisions. Because so many different scenarios exist, and they range between so many different complexities, is is arguable that one can never become "good" at making ethical decision (also due to external factors, like the society factor I mentioned earlier). The world's issue don't exist like grammar mistakes on a standardized test, in a "once you've done a few, you've done them all" format. Despite the amount of ethical decisions you make, there arguably will always be more complex ones, that will always require great thought in order to answer (but of course, many issues that are considered ethical never really have a "right" or "wrong", so technically, you could think about them forever without ever reaching an "answer"!)
  I really enjoy writing about such topics, so definitely look forward to more posts like this one.
  Enjoy!

Short Story--'Because Guys Are Sensitive, Too'

  "Did you enjoy the steak you had?"
  Once again, there was silence. This had been the third time I had tried addressing him and he refused to respond. He was obviously upset; his face was set in a stern expression, and he was clutching the steering wheel extremely tight. He hadn't even been like this until the moment we left the restaurant; during our double-date, everything had been fine. I was becoming irritated with his silence.
  He made a left turn into an empty parking lot.
  "Hey, where the hell are you going?" I exclaimed with frustration. "If you are just going to ignore me, the least you could do is just take me home."
  David parked the car and turned off the engine. He sat there for a moment, before turning to me and asking, "Why wouldn't you let me hold your hand?"
  I was taken by surprise. "Wh--what?"
  "The entire time during dinner, I kept trying to hold your hand under the table. But you wouldn't let me. At one point you even put your hand on top of the table, and when I tried to hold it there, you got out of it by reaching over and touching Savannah's hair!"
  I was literally at a loss of words. "I...I'm sorry...?"
  David sighed. "I just want to know why. It's not even that big of a deal, but it was just irritating that you would keep avoiding my hand..."
  Honestly, I hadn't even noticed I had been doing it. But now that he pointed it out, I could easily remember me shaking off his grasp numerous times. A pang of guilt hit me in my stomach. "I don't know, I didn't really notice I was doing it...But I've told you before that I don't like public display of attention," I ended with, trying to defend myself.
  He chuckled. "Holding hands is considered public display of affection?"
  "Well, yeah, I mean, it is a way of showing affection, and if you're doing it in public--"
  "If I can't hold hands in public with my girlfriend of five months, then there's a problem," David said sternly, cutting my off.
  I looked at him closely. He was leaning against his door, with his head propped up against his hand. He's actually upset about this...?
  I took his right hand into my grasp, brought it up to my lips and kissed the top of it.
  "I'm sorry," I said solemnly. "I didn't think it was such a big deal to you..." My voice trailed off.
  There was silence for a moment before he responded. "I mean, it's not. I just want to be able to hold your hand in public, that's all. Fuck, I don't know why I'm making such a big deal about this."
  I kissed his had again and rubbed it against my cheek. "No, it's okay. You're right, really. I'm sorry." I paused for a moment, before adding, "Sometimes I forget how sensitive you really are."
  The next moment, his hand was absent from where it had previously been against my face. Puzzled, I looked up. He was now facing me, with the serious expression still on his face. "I am NOT sensitive," he said firmly.
  At this, I couldn't help but to laugh. I could see him struggling not to smile, which made me laugh even more.
  "It's not funny! I'm not sensitive!"
  "Okay, okay! Whatever you say," I said, still smiling menacingly.
  At that, he furrowed his brows and slightly pouted as he turned the engine on. While he pulled out of the parking lot, I inwardly continued to chuckle, and started remembering that this was one of the very reasons I had fallen for this boy. But I reminded myself that if I had any intentions of keeping him, I have to be warm and attentive to every last one of his needs.
  Because the simple fact is: guys are sensitive, too.

"Everything will be just fine" ....Right?

  Whenever someone is sad about something, there is one statement that is often used as a comfort mechanism: "Everything will be fine." But is that really true?
  Many people spend their lives thinking optimistically, and do use that mantra to keep pressing through the roughest of times. But I usually label myself as a realist, and my answer to that question is more along the lines of something like, "Eh. Maybe. Maybe not."

  I sometimes run into this problem myself. All of the people I surround myself with have found themselves to make close acquaintances with someone, and engage into relationships. It is a common situation in which I act as the fifth or seventh wheel when spending time with my friends.
  And sometimes my female friends ask me: "Don't you want a boyfriend?" And as much as I portray myself as a "strong independent woman", the blunt answer is yes, I would like to have a relationship.
  On more than one occasion that one question has turned into a full-blown conversation about getting married and finding life partners. And each time, I would express to them my concern: I question whether I will ever find "the one". And I usually support this concern with a simple concept: I am a very complex person. So is there really a high probability that I will find someone who not only is more or less equally as complex as I, but also who accepts my complexity?
  And every time, their responses always are the same. "What? Of course you'll find someone!" "Just give it time; the right one will come around eventually."
  And literally; when they say that, my head explodes.
  Because there is not guarantee that I'll find someone. As depressing as it may sound, there are people in this world who do never get married and age and die without a partner. Who's to say that I won't fall into that category?
  Another situation like such occured during a conversation between me and one of my basketball coaches. He was inquiring whether I was going to "play soccer" for that particular school year. And I corrected him, saying that I was going to "try-out"; the final decision of whether I would be allowed to represent and play for the team would be entirely up to the coaches. When he asked me why I worded it like that, I simply responded "well, because I probably won't make the team".
  And this made him furious. He said that having such a mindset was what was going to make me get cut from the team. And (of course, being the realist that I am) I again corrected his statement by saying the reason I would get cut would be because of the deficit of skill level I have compared to the other girls trying out. It went back and forth again: he said that if I trained hard enough, that deficit would not exist, and I countered by saying that 4 months of training would be impossible to make up for the experience they've gained from the 5-11 years of playing traveling soccer that most of them have. He ended the conversation by deeming me a "lost hope", because I was so "pessimistic".
  Thinking back to that situation actually makes me laugh, because every single statement I made was an objectively accurate one. I was not putting myself down in any way; I was just simply stating simply facts that shouldn't be ignored when addressing the issue of whether I would "play soccer". Is there anything wrong with that?

  This same concept could be applied to many other situations. For instance, a woman named Mrs. Ofri Leitner came and spoke to one of my classes a few weeks ago. She is genetic counselor at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. She talked to us about patients that she has handled, and told us about this one couple she encountered, in which the female had a type of cancer. At every session, the woman would complain about her hair loss and how she doesn't feel feminine anymore. And each time, her husband would counter her statement with things like "I think you're beautiful anyways". Leitner's colleague was the one to notice this, and she told us that he pulled the husband aside at the end of one session and instructed him that next time the topic comes up, rather than trying to comfort her, he should simply say, "It sounds like you are really distressed about losing your hair." So at the next session, she started complaining it again, and he said the statement that the counselor told him to. And immediately, the woman responded with, "Yeah, I am, but you know what, it is just a badge telling people that I'm a cancer survivor, so it's not that bad."
  One of the teachers who was sitting in on the speaker raised her hand and commented. "Yeah, my father has cancer, and you know, it's really hard on him," she says. "He doesn't like to complain about it, but I can tell how much he is suffering. But you know, sometimes I just turn to him and go 'Man, it must suck being sick.' And you know what he says? 'Yeah. But, eh, what can you do about it.'"
  It's interesting, isn't it? Trying to comfort these sick individuals with the optimistic "Everything will be alright" sometimes isn't the best way to approach their situation; but rather, realistically talk about what's going on with them. And this is understandable, because sometimes, when you are in an unfortunate situation, the last thing you want to do is try to be happy about what seems to be hopeless predicament.

  Personally, trying to make the best light of every situation doesn't help me in the least. Instead, I look at things realistically. Am I insecure about my body? Yes. Will I end up majoring in a science field? No. Did I do well on that exam? Probably not. Does this dress make me look fat? No, but let's just say it would definitely be more flattering on a Size 4 Caucasian girl.
  But before you take away only that message, continue reading, because I am about to BLOW YOUR MIND.

  Despite all of this that I've just said, there is one thing that I feel like my concept does not do well applying to: life.
  And I don't mean life on a small scale, like school or work. I'm talking about the BIG PICTURE: life as a whole.
  One cannot merely live life on the concept of "Eh. Maybe. Maybe not." Because such a life would indeed amount to a meaningless one.
  "Life goes on." This statement has been said by many. And as passive as it may sound, it is actually rather optimistic. Think about it briefly; the pessimist would say 'My life is over', and the realist may say 'There is a possibility that this event will end your life. Or it won't.' This statement looks at the bright side of things, and optimistically looks at the reality of things: your life will continue, despite whatever event you're facing. And that, my friends, is how everyone should look at life.
  It may seem like I just contradicted myself, but if anything, just take away this: on a day-to-day basis, try to look at things as realistically as possible. But when it comes to the big picture of life, be as optimistic as you can.
  That's just my two cents. (:

Virginity

  This is an essay I wrote for my self-picked topic for Speech & Debate. Enjoy, and comment!

Those of us who grew up in the 80’s—or even just those of us who can recognize good music—are probably familiar with the artist Madonna and some of her timeless songs. One of which are titled ‘Like A Virgin’. I’m sure many of you all have heard it, and the lyrics can immediately come to your mind… “Like a Virgin/ Touched for the very first time”. Now, when listening to this song, not much thought is given to what she is saying, but it is something that is actually a rather peculiar thing—the idea of being a virgin. Now, apparently, the general consensus of what it means to be a virgin is to have not engaged in vaginal intercourse. But is that really what it is? Have you ever pondered on the idea that “virginity” isn’t really a state of being, but more so just a concept that was conjured up, solely for the purpose of further dividing our societies? The position that I am presenting about this topic is one that is based on the notions that “virginity” is not something that can be physically determined, that the presence of homosexuals and born-again Christians nullifies this idea, and that the occurrence of rapes in our societies further complicates this idea.

       I want to return back to the widely-accepted definition of virginity. According to the Merriam-Webster online dictionary, one who is a virgin is “a person who has not engaged in sexual intercourse”. And the first definition under “sexual intercourse” is “heterosexual intercourse involving the penetration of the vagina by the penis”. Seems pretty accurate, right? But let’s take a closer look in on this term, from a more medical point of view. This definition did not specify that these terms are gender-specific. But it also tends to be a widely-accepted detail that men are neither virgins or non-virgins, mainly due to the fact that it really just can’t be determined whether or not a male is a virgin or not. Whether a male has had zero or twenty acts of sexual intercourse, there is no physical difference in their anatomy. So doesn’t that in itself prove the definition to be wrong?

       But we should also look at this from the other side of the spectrum. Many people say that the reason females are virgins is due to the hymen; a thin piece of tissue that partially blocks the entrance of the vagina. During sexual intercourse, this piece of flesh is broken, and BAM! No more virginity! But is it really that simple? Let’s think about it. The reason that the hymen is broken is mainly due to vigorous activity that causes it to “pop”. However, the terms of this “vigorous activity” is not exclusive to sex; it is a common occurrence in the activities of horseback-riding or cycling for a girl’s hymen to be broken. Adding more support to this argument is the fact that the hymen is not 100% guaranteed to break during sex. There have even been accounts of women’s hymens being intact after giving birth. These facts prove that “virginity” cannot be physically measured. So since it isn’t based on human anatomy, what is it?

       Although many people refuse to accept it, it is a fact that we have homosexuals in our societies. This really is not a new idea, though; this type of sexuality has been recorded to be present in ancient societies dating back to the BC era. What is so radically different about it is that in modern times, people are being open about it, and demonstrate gay pride, almost to the point that homosexuality could be considered somewhat mainstreamed. Just for a little context, homosexual relationships exist between people of the same gender—so a man with a man, and a woman with a woman. Although this sexual status tends to be a very wish-washy topic, one thing is clear: these types of relationships do not fit in nicely with this idea of virginity. According the definitions that I mentioned before, not only can homosexuals not lose their virginities, but they also do not even have legitimate sex. Since, for humans, sex is not only engaged in for reproductive purposes, but also to demonstrate the extent of love for one’s partner, it is understandable why many homosexuals would be appalled, and maybe even somewhat angered at the idea that they are all, according to a mere definition, still virgins.

       The same kind of situation exists with born-again Christians. These are individuals have gone through a process in which they renew their commitment to their faith, and are forgiven for all their sins. One of such sins being engaging in sex outside of wedlock, these individuals are forgiven for their acts, and claim the title as a “born-again virgin”. But wait; this doesn’t seem like a valid status, since they clearly are not virgins according to the definition, right? We again run into the problem with this word; these individuals don’t fit in the definition. I mean, what jurisdiction does this man-made definition have to tell someone that they are not something that they are accepted as in the eyes of their religious deity?

       In our societies, this concept of virginity is often used as a way to divide people into groups in order to make it easier to discriminate against one another. For instance, in middle schools, a common situation is one in which students who are no longer “virgins” are made fun of and called harsh names. Taking such situation into account, it is understandable why being a child whom has been sexually assaulted may be one of the biggest contradictions to the definition of virginity. Not only would this child have to forever live with whatever traumatic reprecautions would result from the attack, but they also have to face being labeled by terms such as “whore” and “slut” for an event that was completely out of their control. It is also an understandable situation in which sexual assault victims would still consider themselves virgins, even if what happened to them fits the definition of sexual intercourse. Who would anyone be to tell these children, “Nope, you can’t do that. What happened to you is considered sex; so you’re not a virgin.” This proves that as long as rapes and sexual assaults still occur in our world, the idea of “virginity” will remain a skewed one.

       So hear me out. Based on the evidence that I’ve provided, this concept of “virginity” is starting to seem more and more questionable, wouldn’t you agree? Between having no physiology to back up its definition to being somewhat incorrect when controversial yet realistic individuals of our societies are taken into context, this term and its accompanying definition are subject to face some serious heat concerning its validity. I’m not trying to push the definition of this word one way or another; I’m just seeking to raise awareness on the fact that it is definitely lacking on some stage or another. Don’t get me wrong; Madonna is a phenomenal artist. But with this knowledge, maybe I can let you all know that this word, like many others in our language, shouldn’t be mainstreamed in our societies as it is, considering it’s flawed definition. But don’t worry; I don’t consider it in the slightest sense wrong to keep blasting that jam, because, let’s face it: there’s nothing wrong with a song that makes us all feel a little bit more “shiny and new” after hearing it.

Short Story: Dethroned

  I could still hear the clamor of the party in the distance, even though I had walked a good distance away by now.
  With my shoes in hand, and my party dress now wrinkled and slightly ripped, I hobbled my way through the night, making sure to take a route through the neighborhood that housed the elderly couples, so I wouldn't be seen by any adults driving home.
  I didn't want to be seen by anyone. I didn't feel worthy of being looked at. When I left home earlier today, I felt like I was on top of the world, and I was. Now, I couldn't imagine ever being lower than how I currently feel.

(*Flashback*)

  I emerged in the house with my group of "friends", and the clusters of people that was already there cheered. Everyone was trying to speak with me; I was getting compliments about my hair, questions on where I bought my low-cut dress, and snide sexual remarks from the guys. I also heard the audible negative chatter from the crowd: "The slut has arrived."; "Of course, she couldn't have worn a shorter dress."; "Let's see how many dicks she'll fit in her mouth this time."
  However, I ignored all the comments, whether they were negative or positive. Contrary to popular belief, I was actually still a virgin, and never even had a boyfriend. But, as I had learned, such rumors came with the territory, and there would never be anything I could do to stop it. By now, it was just second nature to disregard everything people said about me.
  I navigated through the house and met up with the other girls in the kitchen. We exchanged our popular greeting with each other--"Wuddup, BITCH"--and kissed each other on the cheeks.
  One of the girls handed me a cup. "Drink up, you're not gonna wanna remember this one," she slurred to me with a giggle.
  Of course, there has to be alcohol here, I thought. I wasn't really much of a drinker, really, but it's not like I could turn down the drink; I had an image to keep up. So I plastered on my oh-so-common fake smile and sipped from the cup, just slightly, though.
  The owner of the house approached me.
  "So, uh, you were able to make it out?" he said to me slowly. I could tell that he had ingested some form of marijuana already tonight.
  "Yeah, great party," I replied.
  "You, uh, you know my friend Kevin, right."
  He jerked his head over his shoulder towards the guy behind him. I was pretty sure it wasn't a question, but I looked at the guy and said, "Uh, yeah, I've seen him around."
  "So, uh, what do you think of him, you know?"
  I still had my plastic smile on. "He's cute."
  I assumed he was satisfied with this answer, because he then walked off. Kevin made eye contact with me, before following him.
  Everyone that walked by said something to us, with the females trying to replicate our persona, and the males trying to get our attention (although theirs remained below our waists).
  I was used to these situations, so I just blocked them out, as usual. I wasn't even drunk, but everything was basically a haze. I did notice one girl who was resting in the corner, sitting next to the snack table. I looked at her a little closer, and realized I recognized her. My mother and her mother worked in the same field together, and were well acquainted. She caught me looking at her, which I turned away from her and let out a false laugh at the conversation that was going on around me.
  A pang of guilt hit me in the stomach. Not only are our mothers friends, but we also used to be fairly close. It was upon our entrance to high school that we parted ways--I started wearing make-up and push-up bras, and associating with the upperclassmen, while she stayed close with our orchestra buddies, and still wore her hair in ponytails. What made it even worse it that numerous times, I had openly bashed her, along with many other people I used to associate with.
  I stole another look at her. She was still looking at me, so this time, I didn't bother to look away. She was wearing a simple fashion top, a pencil skirt and a pair of flats, with her hair straightened and let down to cover her shoulders. I was actually surprised to see her look like that, because it had been such a long time since I could bring myself to take a good look at her. At this point, we were still looking at each other, so I figured I should say something to her. I snuck away from the group I was standing with, and took the seat next to her.
  "Hey," I said to her uneasily.
  To my surprise, she looked at me warmly, and said, "Hey." I wasn't expecting her to be so friendly to me, considering all that happened between us the past couple of years.
  But there was also concern in her eyes. "How have you been?" she asked in a low voice.
  It was obvious what she was talking about, but I maintained my plastic smile. "Yeah, of course! I've been fine! You look so good!"
  She didn't return the compliment. She looked down at the cup I was holding. "Should you really be drinking that stuff?"
  Again, I let out a fake laugh. "Oh, it's nothing, really." We both knew this to be a lie.
  Bethany put her hand on my bare leg. "Nicole, if you ever need to talk about things with someone..." She let her voice trail off.
  At that moment, a girl I was slightly acquainted with pulled me up by the arm and said, "Come on Nicole, you haven't even been upstairs yet!"
  As I was being pulled away, I took another look back at Bethany. She was still sitting there, with an unsettling expression on her face. But she said nothing, and I was led away from the kitchen to the second level of the house.
  The hallways were filled with hazy smoke, that reeked of burning paper and water. When I turned around, the girl who I had arrived upstairs with had disappeared. There were people leaning along the walls all the way down the length of the hall, which I had to squeeze past. As I got further down the hall, there were more couples lining the walls, exploring each others body cavities. I peered into a door stationed on the left of the hall, where the smoke was pouring out from. The fog was thick, but I could vaguely make out numerous figures surrounding a table, and more bodies along the walls and on the furniture.
  I could feel myself getting lightheaded from the haze so I turned away and continued down the hallway. I turned left, and, just where the hallway was ending, I spotted another door cracked open. Without hesitating I rushed into it.
  It opened up to a small room: too small to be a bedroom, yet too big to be a closet. There was a couch and a coffee table, with a small candle lit on it. I was amazed to see that no bodies were horizontally positioned on the couch, and took a seat. My eyes still burned from the smoke, so I leaned my head back and closed my eyes.
  The next thing I knew, I felt an arm wrap around my waist and draw me towards the center of the couch. I opened my eyes with a startle, and before I could say anything, a pair of lips collided into mine.
  I jumped away, but the arm pulled me back in towards the person.
  "Where you going," a male voice said. He planted his lips on mine again.
  I placed my hands on his chest, pushing him away.
  "What do you think you're doing?" I croaked. "Get off--"
  "Come on, you know you want to."
  Then he slipped a hand up my dress. I tried to scream, but it came out as a cracked yelp.
  "I said no," I whispered again, pushing him away harder. He then grabbed my wrists, and moved his hand towards my crotch.
  "Just relax," he said smoothly as he pushed my body backwards onto the couch and laid on top of me.
  At this point, I was paralyzed with fear. He had let go of my hands, but I couldn't move them.
  I then heard metal clinking--like un-doing a belt.
  His other hand was still under my dress, and by now he had pulled my thong down around my thighs.
  "I-I'll scream, I swear," was all I could say in a hoarse voice.
  He snickered and said, "Go ahead. Because everyone will believe what the school whore has to say." He leaned closer to my ear and whispered, "You've been asking for this all night, so shut up and take it."
  The events after that are slightly blurry. I made no noise; I felt nothing. I could hear his grunting the entire time, and felt his heartbeat against my chest.
  It was as if my own heartbeat, however, had disappeared.
  When it was over, all I could do was lay there. I was staring at the ceiling the whole time.
  Before he departed, he stood above me holding a condom.
  "You're welcome," he said, dropping it onto my chest.
  With that, he left the room.
  In that moment where he stood over me, I saw his face for the first time.
  Although the candle flickered back and forth and the light only danced across his face briefly, I was able to immediately identify my attacker.
  It was Kevin.

(*End Flashback*)

  My limbs were still numb with disbelief, but the area between my legs had now began to sting with pain. I stopped at the corner of the street, and slumped down next to the stop sign, grasping onto the base of its metal post.
  Because everyone will believe what the school whore has to say.
  You've been asking for this all night.
  Shut up and take it.
  I kept replaying these words of his in my head. I couldn't tell if he was right...had I been asking to be raped?
  A car pulled up and stopped on the curb next to me. I merely slouched down closer to the ground in an attempt to not be seen.
  When I felt a hand touch my shoulder is when I jumped, and shrieked.
  But I turned to find Bethany's warm eyes looking down at me. "Shh, shh, it's okay. It's just me. No one else."
  At the sight of her warmth, and her kindness, I immediately burst into sobs.
  She sat down next to me and let my head fall into her chest.
  "He-he...he..." was I could say in between sobs.
  But she didn't say anything. She just sat there with me, in the coolness of the night, rocking me back and forth as I cried about the events of the night.

Nature vs. Nuture

  Hello everybody!
  It's surreal to think that we're already at the end of the first month of the year. I actually just celebrated another year since my birth a few days ago; it was like any other day, though. In all honesty, I don't feel any different. Odd, maybe? 
  But on to today's subject matter: psychology.
  I am currently enrolled in a psychology course, and I absolutely love it. I think it may be because it talks about the way we think, why we think that way, and what that way of thinking means. All of these ideas are things that I'm usually interested with, because I'm constantly thinking about the bridge between people's thoughts and their actions.
  Often, we run into a common debate in our discussions: Nature vs. Nurture. This argument is basically based on two conflicting ideas: one that say different actions and behaviors are born embedded in us, while the other say that these things are learned.
  It's really interesting, once you start thinking about it. We all know that the phenomenon in which a bird cares for her young would fall into the 'Nature' category, because no other bird teaches her how to do it. But it becomes a much more complicated distinction when applying it to humans, which are much more complex creatures.
  One good example is personality. Does she have a bad temper because it was passed down in her genes, or is it because she developed it from watching her dad blow up over nominal things on a routine basis? Is the reason why he is so pompous because of over-confidence being passed down in his mother's family, or is it because he just mimicked his mother's behavior? I for one have noticed that I love talking on the phone, as does my mother; is it because it is a genetic thing, or because of all those years seeing her with a telephone glued to her ear?
  Intelligence is also another thing that challenges the Nature vs. Nurture debate. Another interesting aspect of this debate looks at how much either of these concepts is incorporated into our health, for conditions such as heart disease and schizophrenia. Last year, I even actually found out that the way they studied Nature vs. Nurture was by separating identical twins by placing them in different environments, and seeing whether or not the change in the environment (Nurture) will impact their likelihood of inherit tendencies and medical conditions that were demonstrated by their parents (Nature). At the conclusion of the study, they determined that they both play a part in many of these things, but it is nearly impossible to determine specifically which one contributes more.
  You may have never realized it, but you yourself have probably had or heard a conversation pertaining to the Nature vs. Nurture debate. Maybe someone has asked you if you think homosexuals are "born like that"? Well, that's what Nature vs. Nurture! I find it to be an interesting and thought-provoking thing to think about whether people are already born knowing what their sexual orientation is, or whether it is decided post-conceivement. I pose this question to you, and ask you not to just make up you mind or take the position that you already have; I am challenging you to really think about it. If you think it is inborn, why do you feel that way? What pushes you to feel that a newborn, who knows nothing of the world that it was born into, would yet already know what his/her sexual preference is? And if you think it is something that is realized post-conceivement, specifically how to do you think it is "learned"? Do you think sexual orientation is adapted from those surrounding you, or is it something you just figure out on your own?
  I'm not going to lie; I don't even have a concrete standpoint on the above issue. If I had to say something about it, I would have to agree with psychology's conclusion that it's a little bit of both. And although it isn't an easy thing to actually consider, I am posing such a complicated question to you all because I'm confident that you are all intelligent and capable of doing such mature, in-depth, responsible thinking about a subject as controversial as this. (But maybe don't think about it for too long...it is REALLY complicated, and my head actually started hurting after prolonged thought about it.)
  Let me know your thoughts and responses--I'm definitely interested in hearing what people of both the young and the older generations have to say about such things.
  Happy Thinking!

The Debate of Life

  When it comes to issues that deal with human lives, it's never black-or-white, and never easy. These subjects are always complicated, and can be hurtful for those involved.
  We are seeing this again with two different situations going on in two different states. One involves a 13-year-old California teen who went in to get her tonsils removed and ended up being declared brain dead three days later. They say it's entirely unclear what happened, but the issue is that since brain death has been declared and verified, the hospital wants to have her taken off life support, which the family objects to. The second situation takes place in Texas, where a pregnant female paramedic is being held on life support, against her wishes (according to the husband, who is also a paramedic), due to a Texas state law that puts the rights of the fetus over the wishes of the mother.
  Both very, very interesting situations, if you ask me. These cover the questions of Life vs. Death and Faith vs. Science.
  I find the one with the California girl to be extremely heart-wrenching. To think that one going in for a simple procedure could come out with a death certificate....And the circumstances are really hard too. Although she has been declared "brain dead", her heart is still beating, and the mother says that she moves her eyes and hands sometimes.
  The sad truth is, with the hospital, it comes down to money. I suspect that the family's insurance coverage ran out, and the hospital obviously isn't going to work for free, so that indicated their time to cut her off. Which, obviously, is wrong. But then there's the other side of the spectrum: if the family does take her to another hospital (which, even if they got permission to move her, I suspect that it'd be extremely hard to find another hospital who would take her in), how long will they keep her on life support? I know that they say they have hope, and are expecting a miracle, but it's hard to argue with the science that she has no brain activity, which, in theory, is a form of death..
  Then there's the Texas couple. People say awful things about the husband for his desire to take her of life support, but it's completely understandable, because they had had the conversation dozens of times (which makes sense, since they are both paramedics). He even says that they were going to sign DNR (Do Not Resuscitate) forms to make it official, but this incident occurred before they had a chance to. But at the same time, I doubt that they ever talked about DNR procedures in the situation in which she was pregnant. The state's statute makes sense, and usually, I would think that family members would back it 100%, since the case is usually that they feel that the mother would want to save her child, even if she is going to pass away (kind of as a mother's "dying wish"). I'm actually rather surprised that the husband doesn't feel the way that I just described, especially with him not being a first-time parent.
  These two cases have raised a lot of talk in the United States, and for good reason, too. To me, its relieving to hear the people of this country talking about something that's actually relevant to society, rather than worrying about the newest couples of Hollywood, or the Royal Family in England.
  I'm interested to know what people think about this, especially the younger generation. Leave a comment stating your opinions on these topics!

College App Question

  For this entry, I thought that I would post my answer to one of my college application essays. I won't say what school this question was from, or even explicitly state the question; I'm only going to post my response. (is this even ohkay?) The reason I want to publish this is because this is one of the only essay questions in which I was really able to display my personality, proficiency as a writer, and creativeness, all at the same time. Bear in mind though; college applications are TEDIOUS, and this university was among the last that I applied to, so I was a bit tired of the essay-writing. So some of it may not make too much sense, or be extremely well-written, but that's alright.
  Hope you enjoy it.

            ‘And after I would have followed that rainbow for miles and miles, I would have come to the end of it. And at that end, would be a pot of gold, along with a Leprechaun population, whom I would spend the rest of my days with, living in peace and prosperity.’

            Pretty original, right? This probably sounds like the cliché junk that you may have read on other applicants’ essays. Well, to your and my relief, I am nowhere near that cliché, nor unimaginative.

            Whenever I see a rainbow, the logical side of me sees it as a natural phenomenon occurring due to interactions between water and photons from the sun. But then the creative side of my starts to get thinking, and I wonder: What lies over that rainbow?

            I’m not going to lie; when I have such a thought, it usually lasts for about 3.5 seconds before my interest moves to topics with easier answers, like chemistry homework, or SAT problems. So to answer this question today, it did take some serious thought. And at the end of such serious pondering, I constructed an answer.

            On the other side of the rainbow, I hope to find a young new world, which is populated by inhabitants not of the human species. I imagine these beings to be what society commonly calls “aliens”: bipedal, but having different body forms, characteristics, and genetic makeup from that of humans. These being would reproduce asexually, meaning that all individuals would conceive offspring (although I would think that sexual intercourse could be optionally engaged in, because…well, come on). And this world would be a utopia.

            The reason I pose such a situation is because to me, a rainbow is a symbol of all things good. And, the unflattering truth is, our current world isn’t all that good. So upon looking over the rainbow, I would hope that such standards hold true.

            The reason I don’t see humans ruling that utopia universe falls along the lines of the thinking of Thomas Hobbes: humans aren’t good people. This being said, I would imagine the foreign creatures to be “good”—unbiased, good-natured, and selfless.

            Finally, with the conditions I have set here today, I see this world reaching far beyond our wildest imaginations as far as science and technology is concerned. And it will all stem from the fact there are solely good intentions for everything that they create and put work into.

            From looking at a rainbow, I gain a little bit of hope that there is indeed a strip of good in this evil world we live in. And over that rainbow, I dream of my ‘hope’ being a reality, where the tables for good and evil are turned, and a truly good world does exist.